The Forgetten Days

This week my morning babysitter is out of town so Parker is getting up early with Mom everyday.  He is so funny when he is in the store with me....he is the most content when he is helping.  This morning he was windexing the tables and then part of the wall and then part of the cabinet and the the trash receptacles.  He came up to me and said, "I am cleaning anything that I find that is dirty Mom!"  If only all of my employees had that mentality!  It was great having him there.  I feel like I am being a bit bipolar about me feelings about Parker at work with me.  Last week he had two snow days and was there with me in the afternoon.....afternoon = awful.  morning = great.  Why you ask....because in the morning, it is just us.  He helps and listens.  He knows his limitations.  In the afternoon he can not help as well.  There are other people there that he feels like he needs to entertain.  After he helped me, we went to school.  I have had the opportunity to drop him off at school about 6 or 7 times this year (I think it may be more like 5 times).  I love taking him to school.  I love that I can give him a good bye kiss and tell him to have a good day.  It makes me feel like a great mom when I am able to take him.  But then I drive back to work and I get this sinking feeling in my stomach....I have dropped him off at daycare hundreds of times and it never bothered me, but the few times I have taken him to school, I leave and I am sad.  I can't do it everyday so it is special.  We have a fun morning together and then it is school time and work time.  Every time I have taken him I realize I want to be the one with him in the morning.  I hate having to have a babysitter make his breakfast and remind him to brush his teeth....that is my job.  But it is also my job to provide a stable life for him which means working and for me that starts early.  Now this has turned into me bitching about not getting to do everything I want....so I will stop.  This week is a nice vacation from the norm that I am looking forward too.....by Friday though, he is totally going to be over waking up at 5:30 am with me.  Like Zach said last week, "Child labor has never been so cute."