As a single mom, there are those nights where you wish there was another adult present. When there is no getting through to your child and all communication between you and them just breaks down completely until you are both angry. These kind of nights are so unbelievably frustrating! We got home and within 10 mintues something small (taking the left over stuff from his lunch bag) turned into him having to sit on his bed because he wouldn't stop back talking, whining or crying! Nothing I was saying was helping, he wasn't responding to the time out......I just wanted to scream! Eventually, everything calms down and you have your sweet child back, but during those heated moments, a second adult would be so handy. Those moments make me question my ability as a parent. Those moments make me question, even if I do marry some day, if another adult is all it takes or if I will always be the person who has to handle the extreme moments.
He is sound asleep and has been for over an hour. The house is quiet but I am stil stewing with frustration. What could I have done differently to avoid the outburst? Does he really mean it when he tell me he doesn't like me? Is it another new adjustment of growing? Is he really starting his "I hate my mom" phase at 6? I don't think I could handle that! I know it is coming but I was prepared for it to start around 9 or 10, not now. Could his outburst tonight been because of bullying at camp? So many questions that no one can ever answer for me!
I wonder what it is like to have the built in back up that other co-parenting couples have.....even those who are not together but still co-parent have that going on for them.
Nights likes these make me question my ability of being both mom and dad.